Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Menses: The Most Beautiful Flower In The Garden

My lawyer, Biff, and I have been looking into ways to establesh and document the extant of the damages caused by the fact that all of humanity is forcibly wedged into this unnatural christian Totalatarian 7-day work week. We consulted with my good friend Susan, who happens to be a Certified Women's Studies Professor at the local city college, and she advised us that, yes it is true, that the seven day wrok week is an abomanation.

Susan gently explained to us (Susan has a vary calm way about her, from all her years of meditating, drinking wheat grass juice, and just thinking correctly, she has the calm of the person who is correct all the time) that the whole world actually works on the 28-day cycle of the goddess, Menses.

Menses, it seems, was a sweet, fragrant flower in the garden of Diana. In the ancient days when the Goddess Luna rained, before the current evil paternalistic age of Pisces, Menses was the most beautiful flower in the Garden. But then, the vicious and diabolical god Apollo ascended into the sky, and set fire to all that was good and beautiful.

The beautiful flower goddess Menses was instantly scorched and set alight. She was liquidated, nevre to be scene again.

Diana, the tendress of the once-beautiful garden, became very sad and began to weep and moan. The world has never scene a woman more sad than Diana was in the early part of the age of Pisces. But, in her weeping, their emerged a new idea in Diana's conscioiusness. And that new idea was The Seed. She thought to herslef, "I will disperse little seeds upon the ground and from forth of one them shall cometh a beautiful flower just like my beloved Menses. "

And surely enough, Menses did spring froth from the ground. But, the age of Pisces is raigned by the dynasty of Apollo and therefroe Menses was no longer eternal. She was still the most beautiful of all the flowers in Diana's once perfect garden, but now her life span was just 28 days.

So, you see, this is the origin of the 28 day cycle. And this 28 day cycle forms the rhythm of life. If we live by the rhythm of life we will be blessed. If we choose to go against the rhythm of life we shall be accursed with all the evil's of the age of Apollo (Bushitler, etc.) .

So, Susan, Biff, and I were agreed. A 28 day work week it shall be. From now on, people will wrok twenty days straight and then take eight days off.

Doesn't that sound like it will work better?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

My brother is a member of Menses. He's real smart. I wished I was as smrat at him.

I asked him what they do as the Menses meetings. He says it's just like a Nascar race accept they keeps there shrits on, and they drink tee instead of beer, but other than that they just talk about smrat things. I guess.


3:09 PM  
Blogger notmemes said...

thank you (think you!) for this post memes, just what i needed for when I got out of the hospitel (today).

diana sounds like the most beautiful of lovely godieses, sweet and kind. i heard that all the whole world was once ruled by goddeses (called matribarky) and everyone ws happy.

thin bushhiter came, ruined it all, raping, pilaging.

dam him.

1:43 AM  
Blogger notmemes said...

to recooperate from ritalin overdos, I'm watching Top Gun, to learn ins & outs of bushiter's military industrel complex (different than my inferiority complex).

but also memes, this is the gayest movie that was ever made

(except for gay movies) (ntohing wrong with that).

1:47 AM  
Blogger cloverthe lamb (little) said...

Oh ! Meems must be thniking bout looknig fro rell job ! This good nu's fro Daisy !

Thort bout mining indistry Meems? Halilbruton vrey snesitive to nacherul rythums, bin usnig Mensan clalender fro ever.

1:29 PM  

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